Sunday, July 12, 2009

Funny things I've said that made people laugh

I'm not gonna lie.
I think I'm funny. I'm the kind of person who will randomly reminisce (and possibly laugh to hysterically to myself in the most serene of moments) over funny things I've said that made people laugh. The most recent thing I've said that elicited more than the expected chortle was when I was in the lab measuring grams of a salicylic acid to make quick n' dirty aspirin. For those unaware of what salicylic acid looks like, I'll tell you.

Coke. And not the legal, drinkable kind.

The aspirin recipe called for exactly 2.00 grams. Producing exact measurements is typically hard and time consuming. I was particularly lucky that day. Just one swift dollop of acid from the bottle to the machine produced the exact measurement of 2.00 grams. Because this NEVER happens, I had to say something (to myself) to express my luck and gratitude to the exact measurement gods:

"Booyaahhhh! 2.00 grams exactly...and WHAT? I'm makin' measurements like I was a member of a Columbian cartel."

Obviously, if you didn't think that was funny, it's okay. I understand.

The next funny thing I said that made people laugh involves a night where I was slightly inebriated. I don't remember much of that night except for somehow, I got into a conversation about test tube babies and how it's possibly more enjoyable for men to donate sperm to sperm banks that it is for females to donate eggs to egg banks. I said, "It's probably more enjoyable for men to donate because it's not like a woman can donate by masturbating her eggs out. They have to extract it from her." To give you a glimpse into *how exciting my daily life is, let's just say I'll be laughing quietly to myself over this for weeks.

* Not very exciting.


  1. I love your sense of humour. When I first met you, I could tell you're a funny person. =p

    - Ellie (electric_ballet)
    too damn lazy.

  2. Haha thank you!
    You have a great sense of humour!

  3. hahaha Columbian cartel... great reference. I'm so lucky you're my friend.

  4. You know I'm down with your cartel too!